I'm old. Officially. I heard myself saying one of those things that old people say.
I was round at my parents when my tiny niece pottered round to say hello and cadge a few biscuits. She decided she wanted to go to the loo so I accompanied her up the stairs to do the necessary. (My mum's knees aren't clever so they've got one of those raised loo seats with the side bars; small people without step ladders need a hand to get up and onto it.) Having done her business she pulled off a pile of toilet roll to wipe herself down. And then a bit more to be on the safe side. Having filled the bowl with paper she started to pull some more off the roll.
"You don't need all that toilet paper!" I protested.
"Yes, I do!" she retorted.
And that's when I said it.
"There are little babies starving in China..."
Fairyhedgehog's son looks after his mum's knees, all the better to spare her raised loo seats.
ReplyDeleteOh, for shame, Kevin. For shame.
ReplyDelete*neglects to mention every time she goes shopping she says "I'm not paying THAT!" in a loud granny-voice, all disapproving, like*
Wasn't "There's children starving in Japan" a (suitably inverted logic) line from Mel Brooks' Dracula: Dead and Loving It?
ReplyDeleteThat's hysterical. I've never heard that phrase used in quite that context before.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the link to my son's card. I hadn't realised what he was sparing me.
I find myself muttering: Does she know what she looks like? an awful lot... you'd think the Queen could afford a proper stylist.
ReplyDeleteSx
Would the little babies eat the toilet roll?
ReplyDeleteI have accepted that I am old because I appear unable to stay out in a pub beyond 10pm on a weekday. I complain about the price of a pint, the noise and the general absence of witty repartee and badinage.
Scarlet: welcome to our side of the comfy slipper horizon!
ReplyDeleteGadjo: could be, sir, could be...
Fairyhedgehog: you're OK so long as he doesn't start building you a stairlift.
Madame: I rather doubt it. You describe the symptoms of crap pubs rather than old age.
My dear old nanny used to say you only needed three squares: one up, one down and a polisher. And that was Bronco, FFS.
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