Thursday, April 28, 2011

Bunting is compulsory

Bunting and frolic abounds in the nation as Royal Wedding fever grips one half of the population and a virulent mood of "sod the wedding" grips the other. This is all too evident in Helminthdale Town Hall where many of the offices are ostentatiously undecorated by Union Flags while some mad enclaves are packed to the gunnels with Franklin Mint figurines of West Highland terriers with flags and roses in their mouths.

Street parties are compulsory, especially outside The Monkey's Arms where this is business as usual most nights from eight in the morning when the chemist's shop starts selling meths and Night Nurse. Lubianka Avenue will be hosting the gala parade featuring, inevitably, Year Six of St. Barrabas' Free School And Call-Me-Dave Academy, who will be providing a picturesque tableau float representing "The RĂ´le of the Cold Sore Through The Ages."

A good time shall be had by all. Especially me 'cos I'll be staying in bed well out of it.

10 comments:

libby said...

We had neighbours once called Frank and Polly, only I used to get the names mixed up and call them Prank and Folly.....for some reason they came to mind just then as I read your post on the forthcoming hoopla.........like you I shall have a long lie in and enjoy not being at work....and then off the friends for a drink and a 'lets ignore this rubbish' party.

Charlie said...

Britain is having another Royal Wedding and the US President found his birth certificate, proving that indeed he was born.

Hoopla poopla. When's the Miss World competition, a worthwhile event?

dinahmow said...

Thankyou - I've just made a connection that seems to have been overlooked: West Highland Terriers. They're to be cross-bred with Royal Corgis.

Gadjo Dilo said...

I wish I was there.

Pat said...

To my surprised delight my son and grand-son want to watch so I'm going to have a good wallow.
Nobody does it better and it's time to be proud to be British.

Gadjo Dilo said...

Well said, Pat. To my surprise I enjoyed it thoroughly - though this was perhaps assisted by the fact that I had not been bombarded by any information about the event until a couple of days ago.

Kevin said...

I'll admit that I found the unrelenting stream of "why I don't care about the Royal Wedding" even more tiresome than the deathless Glenda about the wedding-to-be. Two peole got married, there was a bit of a party, job done.

syncopated eyeball said...

I was born and lived in England til I was fourteen and I have never understood the fuss about the royal family.
Extreme wealth disgusts me.

Lulu LaBonne said...

Been hiding from street parties for 2 weeks now - is it safe to come out yet?

wendy house said...

I was lucky enough to hole-up in a fabulous socialist stronghold (Hull) where they proudly told me that no-one had applied for street party permission and even if they wanted a street party they didnt need permission. Best of all bunting was was being used as underwear.